Happy New Year!

I shall attempt to make this as short as possible…! We all know I’ll end up rambling on about something ridiculous or stupid, because that’s how I work. So, I’ll get to my point now: you’re all perfect.

Well, this year has been a tough one. There have been good and bad things. I could totally avoid talking about the negatives of this year, but that’d be ridiculous. Negatives and positives are opposite, opposites and equals. They are as important as each-other.

This year, I hit rock bottom. I literally broke. I’ve lost the will to live too many times to count, in this year alone. Before this year, I was pretty good at hiding my emotions. I was so emotionless; I was once asked if I was a robot. Mockingjays may understand what I mean better if I said I was a bit like Katniss – no emotions, no speaking about certain things… Anything to keep other people safe.

It took time, but that changed. I was too blind to see it, but before I was broken. Some things, however, need to get worse before they can get better. I was like that; I had become so accustomed to not showing emotions that I barely felt a thing – no guilt, no happiness, no sadness, nothing. Yes, my mood went from hyper to angry or something pretty quickly and without me realising, but even then I couldn’t feel it. It’s as though I became…numb, I guess.

But, back in February, a friend of mine convinced me to start talking on the blog. I think it was February… Valentines day I remember to be the first day of the year I went without breaking-down… I remember commenting on the blog first on that day. However, the thing I remember most of all would be the talking to the most wonderful people that have ever graced this earth.

Bloglandians… You were the most welcoming people I had ever known. You were all so mature, yet you all knew how to be kids and none of you hid that fact. You all seemed to radiate happiness. Who knew picking up a single book, what, five years ago would lead me to meet such amazing people? I would never have dreamt that it would be possible!

After a few months, you grew to be some of the best friends I’ve ever had. And I wouldn’t trade any one of you for anything in the world! Because, no matter what anyone else says, you’ll always be perfect to me. Always!

Now, to skip over to talking about the Facebook page! Le Gang! Ellikins! March 11^th, 2012, the day I first had a real conversation with one Miss Ellie O’Connell! She was… Well, she was amazing. She was fandom famous, according to most, but that didn’t stop her from being down to earth and incredibly kind to me. She was one of the nicest people I had ever met. Her along with Andrew, Becky, Nathan and Joe! I believe I first started talking to Andrew because of The Defenders… Anyone remember them? My sister designed a logo for them! It’s really cool! I’ll have to show you guys one day…! Unless we’re going to turn it into something for the Skuttlebuggia flag…Which sounds like a mighty good idea, to me!

Anyway, back to Ellie. After a couple of days she and I were so close we may as well be sisters! And so every 11^th of every month becomes a Sisterversary. Every 11^th of March becomes a Year Sisterversary. A celebration of how long I’ve had a new sister. A celebration of friendship between myself and one of the most wonderful people I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. Ellie, you’re perfect! That’s all I have to say. Ellie has helped me through so much this year. We’ve been there for each other, like family should be. Yes, we’ve had our fights, but we’ve resolved each and every one of them and ended up in laughter. And now I’ll stop talking about Ellie because I have SO much more to write! Actually, battlepacks. Skittles. Rainbows. Gnomes. Now, I’m done.

Le Gang! 30^th April, no? 30^th of each month signifies a Brothday of Le Gang. A group of Minions – Andrew, Becky, Ellie, Joe, me and Nathan – that quickly bonded and soon became, well, inseparable. Yes, we don’t talk as much as we used to, but we’re all still there for each other. Ashley also became a part of Le Gang and I adore her! Ashley, you’re pretty damn amazing no matter what anyone else says! We all laughed and cried and no matter what happened we all ended up smiling together because we’re family. There are so many memories that make me smile about Le Gang, Nathan even wrote some things about Le Gang…Nerds in New York, was it? It was genius, anyway! And the Skype conversations would never cease to make me smile. The laughs we shared and the happiness that was clearly all around will never be forgotten to me. No matter how old I get, I will never forget that I’m a part of Le Gang and I always will be. I will never forget these guys, that were always there for a laugh, always there to cheer me up when I needed them, worried when I had to go to the doctors/hospital and are still there for me, today. I remember when the Facebook page had a bit of a fight… I wrote a message saying how much Skuttlebugs had done for me and everything… But I didn’t have the courage to post it myself. Joe or Andrew posted it on my behalf and said it was anonymous, that they didn’t want to say who wrote it. Between us, the whole matter was resolved. Le Gang did that together. Many of the good things that have happened this year have been because of Le Gang, or the Bloglandians or Twitterians…And a few Facebookians! Anyway, I will forever be in the debt of Le Gang. For the smiles, the laughs, the tears and the comfort, for the safety and joy, but mostly because they showed me I’m not alone even in the darkest of times.

Ashley, I briefly mentioned her up there. Ashley is… Well, she has one of the most pure hearts I’ve ever known, she’s got a supermodel smile and a heart of gold! She’s beyond pretty, one day she might believe it! If I didn’t know better, I’d say she was daughter of Aphrodite! Just far more selfless than you could imagine someone to be. Ashley is funny, kind, clever and down to earth. No offence Ameriminion, but Ashley is, by far, my favourite Ameriminion! And, quite possibly, my favourite American!

Nathan next? Yes, let’s talk about Nathan. He’s incredible, hilariously funny, very talented and he can make me smile no matter what. He has the ability to be serious when necessary but a child when he wishes and I find that extremely amazing! He’s been through a lot, most of us have, but you’d never guess it. It’s probably true; those that suffer the most smile the brightest. Nathan’s smile is a difficult one to beat! It’s so infectious you can’t help but smile when he’s happy!

Andrew, Andrew, Andrew…. I could write about Andrew forever. The strength he shows every day is matched by no other. Hilarious, intelligent, geeky and strong. Andrew is such a wonderful person and understands me pretty well a lot of the time. Some people don’t seem to like him – because they’re stupid! – but I simply adore him! There’s nothing that anyone could do or say that would make me believe him to be a bad person. He’s always there for me when I need him and I will always be thankful for that!

I’ve already talked about Ellikins, so let’s move onto Joe. Brosephine. He’s from Liverpool that makes him already awesome. One of my fondest memories of talking with Joe would probably be the day after we spoke about rainbows. I believe it was the day after, anyway… Anyway, he told us how he was learning about Rainbow Fizz in science and could only think of the conversation we had previously about Rainbows. I giggled for a very long time after that… Joe’s tremendous, he really is. Anyone to say otherwise needs slapping with a soggy cherry flavoured iced baguette!

“Never forgetting Becky, the irrepressible Becky, a girl for whom the word ‘obsessed’ was undoubtedly coined.” Baguettes.

…
Alright, I’ll actually write something sincere. Becky is brilliant. Hilarious, artistic, hilarious, rainbows, stupidly clever, beautiful and I am truly honoured to know her. Becky, I wish I could write more but you know I’d end up sobbing because you’re perfect and too many wonderful things to write about. Just know that you’re perfect and you’re beautiful! Your imagination is most definitely a frightening one, but that’s yet another thing I adore about you. I’m sorry there are idiots in this world that give you hate, you should never ever get hated on because you’re perfect! You better start to believe it, too!

Bloglandians, back to you. I’ve had a tough year, my parents have argued more than normal, my arm has more scars than ever before, I was almost anorexic then bulimic, I almost lost a couple of my best friends and that’s on top of everything else.

But, Bloglandians have always been there for me. To support me and make sure I’m okay. I started this year not knowing any of you and I’m ending this year loving every single one of you more than I could ever have imagined I would. Some of you I only talk to on the blog, some of you I started off on the wrong foot with – Death, I’m talking about you – and some of you I was scared would hate me because you were, as they say, blogfamous (Flame, Zathract, Sparky, Nixion, Lynxia…). Sometimes, I don’t believe you guys are real because you’re so...Well, amazing. I don’t deserve to have such amazing people in my life.

Looking back on this year, now, I realised that the people I feared would hate me the most are, generally, my best friends from the blog. Zath, Sparx and Lynx have helped me through more than you could imagine. Between Zath, Hellboy and Derek, I stopped cutting. Sparx is always making me smile and has taught me how to be stronger. Lynxia? She’s taught me that anything is possible, you can be happy no matter what. And all three of them have been more inspiring to me than anyone could even think them to be. They might be younger than me, but that doesn’t stop them from being some of the best people I’ve ever known. They were all there from the beginning and I never want to lose them. They’ll always be in my heart, just like every other Bloglandian.

I think Em needs a mentioning, here. She’s been through a lot in her life, that much I know. I might not know all the details, but I do know that she’s incredibly strong. She’s faced so much already and no matter what, she doesn’t seem to let life get her down, not for long anyway. So, Em, thank you for being you, thank you for being strong and thank you for never letting go. I’m glad you came to Blogland that day and I’m glad I was there when you first appeared. People might say that miracles don’t exist, but you’re a miracle to me. You’re like an older sister, someone that will never leave me to be on my own when I need someone and I can’t imagine a world without you, not now. You can’t ever leave us, no matter what happens!

There are so many more Bloglandians I could talk about but I’m only going to mention a few because there are so many other things for me to write about and I’m going to run out of time!

So, Val V’s definitely insane and never fails to make me smile. She’s the only person that could play Stephanie in a Skulduggery Pleasant film! No doubt about that!

Star, my Yorkshire buddy! Star, you’re really weird and your Nix jokes are so unbelievably funny! You’re truly amazing and I love how obsessed with Disturbed you are. You’re also very good with book recommendations… Artemis Fowl, Gone… Any more to recommend?

Eve, I don’t even know what to say about you. Words fail me. Words fail me. Let’s just leave it at you’re hilarious and one of the sweetest girls I’ve ever known!

Mara, you’re beautiful. Accept it.

Kallista, you’re perfect. Please don’t lose hope!

Hellboy, though I doubt you’ll read this, you’re awesome. I’ll always be thankful for everything you’ve done for me and I’m always going to be sorry for what I’ve done. You’re one of a kind and I’ll never forget you. I can only hope that your life is as wonderful as you deserve it to be.

I would write something for each and every one of you but that’d take up too much time because I have to write so much more and I have so little time…So to any Bloglandian I’ve missed: you’re perfect and I love you! Never forget that!

Twitterians! You always know how to make a day eventful. And your tweets are all so funny and kind and lovely and amazing and sometimes really witty! I’m just going to mention a few people…

Emma, I can’t believe how lovely you are to me. You never seem to have a horrid word to say about anyone and you’re just…Amazing. I’m so glad I started talking to you – I’ve never once regretted it! You’re perfect, my dear, time to believe it!

NJ, you’re beyond amusing. And you say the sweetest of things! Your Skulduggery collection is beautiful and I really want it! You’re stunning, don’t give up fighting!

Ash, doubt you’ll read this but whatever can’t forget one of the most amazing Twitterians there is, you’re so unbelievably nice to me and I’m really glad you’re a Skuttlebug! You’re beyond wonderful.

Georgia, I don’t think you’ll read this but Golden God woman you’re perfect! You’re so funny and pretty and amazing and the ships and yeah. You’re amazing and I love you lots. Never forget that!

I love all the Twitterians! You’re all so lovely and I don’t think I’d like Twitter as much without you…

Now I should probably talk about my main page – Skulduggery Pleasant Magic Vs. Magic. My admin are better than any other admin I could have dreamed of having. So, Ravel, Mesmer, Cassidy and my TAs – Dorcha, Charisma and Luna – please never ever forget how perfect you are! I couldn’t run the page without you guys and every like we get on a status or a picture makes me proud to be an admin and proud to be working with such great admin. I’m not too bothered about reaching 200 likes, to be completely honest with you; I’m only bothered about making sure everyone is having a fun time – admin included. You admin have taken good care of my page already and I love you all for how you have treated the fans, the admin and the page.

Fans of the page, you’re wonderful. Thank you for liking the page and sticking with us, the page passed a year old last month and I am so incredibly proud of it, my admin and you. I couldn’t ask for a better page, because the numbers don’t matter. It’s the love that matters, to me, and every time I log in to find a notification on one of my pages a huge smile spreads across my face because I know I must have done something right. Thank you.

One fan of my page in particular, Paul, has become a really good friend of mine recently. And he really deserves more appreciation from me, I think. It’s a weird day when he can’t make me smile and I often wonder how he does it. I swear to the Golden God, if I don’t get to go to a signing with him next year I will scream! I want to thank him, in person, for all the good he has ever done me because he doesn’t have to put up with me, though he does choose to.

I also want to say thank you to everyone I’ve ever talked to, smiled at, laughed with or even known for a couple of seconds. You’re the people who have made me who I am today, the good and bad things. I’m happy with who I am, because I am me and I couldn’t ask for better friends than the ones I have.

I know now that no matter how many times someone insults me, no matter how many times I get bruised by my brother, no matter how many people yell at me, no matter how many times people talk about me behind my back, I’ll always have friends. No matter what happens, I’ll know that I will never be on my own because family is forever. And my family is made up of you guys, Minions. This year may have been the worst of my life, so far, but it didn’t stop it from having some of the best moments. From the moment I started talking to you all to Derek and Joe writing on their arms to everyone sending me e-mails and messages saying happy birthday to writing this right now. Some of the best moments of my life have been because of this fandom and I’m determined to make some memories even better.

I’ve decided already, 2013 is going to be a good year. I’ll start it with the most amazing friends anyone could ever wish for and I’ll end it smiling. That is a promise.